BTS

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Somewhere, a fancy dress shop is missing their stock.

BTS is a South Korean boygroup. Their name stands for "Behind the Scene" in Korea, but are also know internationally as "Bangtang Sonyangdang", "Bulletproof Somethingoranother", "Boys That Sing", and "who?". They are signed under BigHit Music, a subsidary of UNICEF. The group's activities are monitored by the civilian organisation ARMY, full name "Adorable Representative MC for Youth".

Pre-debut[edit]

BTS is the brainchild of infamous South Korean hitman "Bang" (real name unknown), shadow leader of BigHit.

“I wish for BTS to be the antithesis of modern idol music. Idols create a fake image of cool perfection, but I oppose this. Instead, I want to make a group that creates a fake image of lameness, to critise Korean society. ”

~ "Bang", via an anonymous audio clip leaked online.

“BTS is the best lah! That's why we use them to promote for LOTUS! Get it?”

~ Proton (Lotus)

The members were trained on Jeju island, a Korean military base, for up to 4 years before debut. Their routine during this time consisted of strict dieting, 13km runs in full idol equipment, 10-14 hours of training and mandatory high-school education for the younger members.

Career[edit]

BTS debuted in 2013 with the album 2 Cool 4 Skoo featuring title track Dreams R 4 Losers. The music video is a satirical examination of Korea's obsession with American culture, particularly hip-hop. The costumes BTS wore were parodies of Korean street fashion, which is heavily influenced by the West.

Their follow-up album, O! R U L8 2 with the single No Offense stars BTS as dull-brained high-school students, who are unable to keep up with classwork so they stage a revolt against public education. It has been speculated that the string players in the music video (MV) are a reference to student rights advocacy group Heavenly White Violins Playing as Cool Guys Walk Down Stairs, also known as HWVPCGWDS.

Endorsement controversy[edit]

BTS's 2017 comeback single DNA sparked controversy in Korea due to excessive product placement of Gucci. Korean law restricts product placement in MVs to no more than 3 pieces, but lawyers found that no less than 273 separate Gucci items could be seen in the video.

“It’s like Gucci puked on them.”

~ Prosecution lawyers

BigHit has argued that the misuse of the Oxford comma in the legislation restricing product placement meant that this law could only be applied to Korean companies. The case was dismissed in Federal Court.

2017 American Music Awards controversy[edit]

During the American Music Awards, BTS managed to hurt the feelings of middle-aged, conservative YouTuber Mark Dice, who attacked BTS with similar lame childish insults that he has used towards Justin Bieber in the past. ARMYs (BTS fandom) simply defended BTS to Mark, who played the victim and claimed BTS "ruined" the American Music Awards.

Members[edit]

  • RM – 24. From Seoul. Was captured by "Bang" when he was 15 and has been groomed to be the perfect Boy Band Leader ever since.
  • Jin – 25. From Seoul. Heir apparent of BigHit Entertainment.
  • Suga – 67. From Daegu. First ever recipient of mechanical tongue replacement designed to enhance artistic and sexual performance.
  • J-Hope – 23. From Gwangju. He was a finalist of the Korean So You Think You Can Dance competition at age 4.
  • Jimin – 14. From Busan. He won the position of Mascot of the 2018 Pyeongyang Winter Olympics, beating contestants like the Samsung logo and Korean grilled meat. The judges comment was, "We decided as a committee that ultimately, cuteness is the most important quality in a mascot."
  • V – 22. From Daegu. Officially crowned "Most Beautiful Man in the World" by the internet.
  • Jungkook – 12. From Busan. aka "The Golden Maknae", meaning "The Golden Pooper", because even his shit is gold.


Conspiracy theories[edit]

Several conspiracy theories exist for BTS

BTS are British[edit]

A popular conspiracy theory is that BTS are in fact British citizens of Korean descent and that the name BTS comes from their hometowns of Bradford, Telford and Solihul. The theory provides alternative explanations of their names:

  • Jungkook: A misspelling of his legal name John Cook.
  • Suga: named after his preference of having three sugars in his tea.
  • Jin: who's real name is Jim, acquired the name Jin because of poor handwriting due to the amputation of his thumb in a lathe accident.
  • RM: initials of his legal name Ryan Manford, he is the half brother of the comedian Jason Manford.
  • J-Hope: Real name John Cooke (not to be confused with John Cook), J-Hope was a nickname since school, due to his hope to become a professional football player for Stoke City.
  • Jimin: A portmanteau of his legal name James Ince.
  • V: Short for Vincent, his management suggested the name V to cover his illiteracy and inability to sign his full name.