User:DanneFrank/Papaya Miller

Papaya Miller

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Papaya Jezebel Miller is a Canadian comedian who geeks might know as the most clinically insane (in a good way) fellow on the Interwebs. Her sick dance moves and bonkers but true life have earned her many fans, with some calling her "the Diablo Cody of Canada" in regards to her vocabulary.

Early life

Papaya Miller was born on June 8th, 1972 in Toronto, Canada along with a twin sister named Rose. They were named Papaya and Rose because their dad loved papayas and their mom loved roses. After the hospital, the twins were inducted into the Millers' house, where they got both Canadian and East Coast US television. Still, Papaya and Rose chose to watch terrifying Canadian children's entertainment most of the time, even though they did enjoy Sid & Marty Krofft (the Makers of Nightmares) and Hanna-Barbera.

In 1976, the Millers went to Walt Disney World in Florida. Papaya loved the Snow White's Adventures ride to bits, from the flat-out shit-scariness, to the sharp turns and high speed motion of the ride, to that insane ending where the Wicked Witch murders you with a gem. However, she and her sister were TERRIFIED of the Haunted Mansion. Go figure. (Creepily enough, Papaya wasn't fazed by the Ontario Educational Communications Authority logo, either, even though it is CHILLING to watch and even more so knowing that was in front of CHILDREN'S PROGRAMS.)

Papaya and Rose instantly became hooked on Star Wars when it came out in 1977; so much so, they watched the infamous Holiday Special a year later on CBS feeds from the east coast. This is where Papaya met her lifelong crush, Boba Fett. That sexy, sexy voice made her 6 year old self feel some type of way... and it stayed with her for the rest of her childhood, even when her sister much more liked Black Vulcan from Super Friends.

Career

After a teenhood with Alanis on repeat, Papaya packed it all up and moved to Cleveland, Ohio with Rose in 1993. There, she discovered the wonders of Cedar Point and racked up her coaster count that only consisted of Dragon Mountain at Marineland, anything at the Flintstone Fun Park in Calway, and other forgettable experiences. Her first job ended up being Magnum XL-200's mascot, just because he looked like Boba Fett.