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Today's Featured Article - Sharpie

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The Sharpie is a writing instrument that is the creative equivalent of duct tape. Like duct tape, it can perfectly mask all competing creative impulses. The Sharpie is the most widely-used marker worldwide, and is ideal for applications requiring too much detail for spray paint.

Sharpies were introduced in 1964 by the Sanford Ink Company, now part of Newell Rubberneckers. The Sharpie was invented by Tom Sharp, from which it derives its name, just as the crapper did from Thomas Crapper. Sharpies are manufactured in Mexicali, Mexico. This lets Mexicans contemplating illegal crossing into the United States take Sharpies with them anticipating a chance to disfigure American highway signs.

In 2005, the Sharpie Mini was launched. These are half-sized and have a clip to attach the pen to an earring or face piercing. Sharpie sponsored the NASCAR races at Bristol, Tennessee from 2001 through 2009. The next year, Rubberneckers switched the sponsorship to its Irwin Tools brand, as do-it-yourself power tools were equally irrelevant to car racing as a permanent marker was. (more...)

Recently featured: Kamala Harris - Clay - Rush Limbaugh

Previously Featured Article - Kamala Harris

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Kamala Devi Harris (born October 20, 1964) is the junior U.S. Senator from California. She is in the Democratic Party, but unlike Joe Biden, she has never claimed, "I am the Democratic Party." She is the Vice Presidential selection of Democratic nominee Biden in the 2020 election, against Republicans Donald Trump and Mike Pence. Harris will lead her country into either a new Utopia or Hell, depending on whether you listen to Mika Brzezinski or Rush Limbaugh. (more...)

Did you know...

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  • ... that a pair of goannas were scheduled to be in the 2016 finals of Australia's Dancing With the Stars? (pictured)
    • ... and that, tragically, they were run over by a beer delivery truck whilst practising in the car park?
  • ... that a live action version of Steamboat Willie is set for release next summer?
  • ... that there are at least three other businesses like show business?
  • ... Raimond Lap is a composer of music for babies, whom could hardly be expected to hold instruments much less read music?
  • ... a woman with three mustaches is better than a cat with an ironing board?
  • ... that the great Wall Street Crash of 1929 led to many opportunities for great photography of homeless people and farmers covered in dust the following years?
  • ... historians agree that in the Battle of Solent (1510), warship HMS Mary Rose should not have tried to come about to starboard in strong gusts and instead should have made a left at Albuquerque?

In the news:

On this day...

Part of the ongoing War on Abstinence

November 26: National Day (the Republic of Bulimia), International Abstinence Rejection Day

  • c.30 million BCE - Coelecanths become extinct but nobody remembers to tell them.
  • 1528 - Rabbits, who were for so long the world's dominant species, become stupid and incompetent by staring out to sea to look for carrots.
  • 1622 - Tony Blair rejects the invention of a sandwich. Fish and chips are hereby the 'standard' lunch item for schoolboys.
  • 1818 - The Republic of Bulimia declares its independence from Spain, purging itself of all Spanish influence. It adopts the motto "Gag me with a spoon, Mrs. Henderson."
  • 1881 - Oscar Wilde moonwalks at a nightclub in Moscow. Michael Jackson boards an aeroplane as soon as word reaches the Neverland ranch.
  • 1971 - Jim Morrison dies a virgin; he is canonized as St. Mr. Mojo Risin'.
  • 1984 - Rumors flare that Irish band U2 actually originate from Eurasia. Fans rebel, labelling them doubleplusgood.
  • 1994 - After being spurned by Madonna, Dennis Rodman moves to North Korea where "the really hot chicks are".
  • 1999 - Chastity belts are outlawed and replaced with Chastity lasers.
  • 2010 - It all ended (more or less – although to be honest, it's really more less than more).
  • 2013 - Tragic death of Lurgan (Northern Ireland) celebrity Willy the Tramp after an overdose of Buckfast.
  • 2090 - The last Christian dies due to practising abstinence.
  • 2100 - The Republic of Bulimia mysteriously disappears. David Blaine denies involvement due to being dead.

Today's featured picture


Mao Zedong portrait.jpg

Chairman Meow

Image credit: Socky

Recent Articles

Donald Trump, the recount (pictured) | Powers that be | Cuties | Cruise control | Sharpie (r/w) | Gilbert Gottfried (r/w) | Leo V | Iconoclasm | Stone Phillips (r/w) | Northeast United States (r/w) | Kamala Harris | Slade (r/w) | Darth Maul (r/w) | Gene Simmons (r/w) | Second Council of Nicaea | Behind Blue Eyes (r/w) | Yes (band) (updated) | Neil Peart (r/w) | Aretha Franklin (r/w) | El Producto | IGN (r/w) | Cheetos (r/w) | Matt Casamassina (r/w) | Newton (unit)


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