Unreasonable hysteria

“Oh my fucking God! I can't think of a witty quip to say! Jesus freakin' Christ!”

~ Oscar Wilde on unreasonable hysteria

Unreasonable hysteria is a psychiatric phenomenon that afflicts millions of adults annually. Wait, what if that's a bad way to start this article?!

Oh God, I'm fucking this up already!

Let me start over!

Wait, a new section? Oh my God, I'm not ready for a new section! I haven't even revised the first one! Holy fucking balls, what do I do?!

Holy freaking God!

Mary, Jesus and great Caesar's ghost, I don't know if this is even redeemable! Oh God, I'M RUINING THE ENTIRE FUCKING UNCYCLOPEDIA!

Was that too many capitals?!?!

Shit! Oh shit! Shit, bullshit and horseshit! Shit, shit, shit! SHIT! What am I supposed to do now!

Sweet holy fuck, it's a picture! Should that be there?!

Look at all that swearing!

This will never be acceptable for children to read! My parents can never read this! I'll never get to run for public office! I'm a disgrace to everything!

Ants

Ants!

Holy fucking Hell, a link!!!

Should I click that? I don't fucking know! Where the Hell does it lead?! What if it leads to [porn]?! JESUS BLOODY CHRIST! That link doesn't even stay inside the wiki!

Is this even a wiki?

Should Wiki be capitalized? Oh my fucking God! YOUR MOM! AAAAAH!

AAAAAAAAH!

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHH!

Oh God. . .

This is all a mess! It's all my fault! Someone's going to kill me for this, aren't they?!

Someone help me!

Get that Todd Lyons guy to help out! He knows what he's doing!

FUCK!

Oh my God, I need to warn everybody about this before it spreads! FUCK!

Wait! SHIT!

FUCK! Woh the hlel know hwo ot work this thign? Fcuk! I think I'ev goen lysdexic!

The cap ate my brain!

ARGH!! The cap ate my brain!! Get it off! GET IT OFF!! Die cap die! Where's my brain!? WHERE!? NOOO!

See also

• Chimp out

Article written in the style of its subject This article is written in the real or imagined writing style of its subject. If you do not find it funny, it is probably because you are the type who needed this explained to you. If you still do not find the article funny, that is surely because a joke loses its humor when it is explained. The authors sincerely hope that you will pick up your game and laugh without prompting in the future.