Uncycloversity:Course Catalog

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How to read this catalog[edit]

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First, obtain an edumacation. This is usually followed by a gradumacation, after which you should be able to read this catalog without having to look up each word in the dictionary individually. With luck, you'll be able to interpret the "characters" on this page as "letters" of an "alphabet," which are strung together to form "words," which in turn are strung together to form "sentences." Luckily, for the purposes of reading this catalog, you won't have to worry about much beyond that. Also, once you've gradumacated, you might not need the courses anymore. That doesn't mean you shouldn't still send us lots of money, though. In fact, it means you should send us more money, because we like money.

Enrollment[edit]

Unlike other universities, Uncycloversity doesn't require you to specifically enroll in each course. You simply click on the link, read the material, and if there are any exams associated with the material, "take" the exams. In some cases there may also be Standardized Tests, but these can usually be safely ignored. This is how all Schools of the Future will work, of course. If you should forget which courses you've already taken, simply click on each link again, write down which course it is for each one on a separate slip of paper, put the slips in a hat, and choose one at random. Once you've chosen one, be sure to send us more money.

Courses[edit]

Department Section Course Title Instructor Credits
Business
BUS 101 Intro to Security Exchanges Charles Ponzi 0
BUS 121 Intro to Business Uncycloversity Staff 0
BUS 123 Economics Ronald Reagan 0
BUS 201 Marketing Uncycloversity Staff 0
BUS 222 Voodoo economics Uncycloversity Staff 0
BUS 256 Quantum Economics George W. Bush 0
BUS 301 Ponzi Economics Bernie Madoff 99
BUS 256 Management Science Dick Cheney 0
Fine Arts
ART 101 Introductory Nude Posing David McCovney 0
ART 201 Intro to Rainy Afternoon Activities Van Gogh 0
Note: Students must sign indemnification waiver covering loss of bodily appendages prior to course
Culinary Science
CUL 107 Culinary Arts Hemingway 0
CUL 212 Basic Recipe Design Swedish Chef and others 0
CUL 255 Cooking for One TBA 0
CUL 404 How to cook a baby Einstien 0


CUL 311 Advanced Professional Catering Sinatra 0
History
HIST 267 American History (advanced placement) TBA 0
HIST 105 Australian History (for Americans) José Cartmenez 0
HIST 123 The Biography of Sir Uncyclopedia Sir Uncyclopedia 0


Home Economics
HOME 210 Home Appliance Repair Chopra/Cameron 0
HOME 319 Lawn Care and Landscaping Techniques Chopin 0
Note: Students are required to supply their own scythe
HOME 303 Advanced Home Invasion Techniques TBA 0
Religion
REL 169 The Orgasm and the Ethereal State Deacon Dickens 0
Cross-listed with: SEX 069 Nerdette and Geekette Studies
REL 450 Islam and Humor: Practical Applications Bin Laden 0
REL 650 How to Repent and Be Saved By God Pope Benedict XVI 0
PREREQUISITES: LANG 215 - Introduction to Hebrew; EDUC 238 - Intro to Killing
Sex and Gender Studies
SEX 101 Educational aspects of porn José Cartmenez 0
SEX 210 Women's Studies José Cartmenez 0
SEX 069 Nerdette and Geekette Studies José Cartmenez 0
SEX 301 Linguistics Dick Cheney 0
Self Defense
DFNS 502 Plane Desnaking (AKA Getting those Motherfucking snakes off this Motherfucking Plane) Samuel L. Jackson 0
Political Science
PSci 501 Internship: Congressional Buttrape Rep. Johnson 0
Biology
BIO 189 Biology of the Kitten 1 Uncycloversity staff 0
BIO 289 Biology of the Kitten 2 Uncycloversity staff 0
BIO 496 Advanced Rat Torture B. F. Skinner 0
BIO 666 Intelligent Design TBA 0

See Also[edit]